I'm a Total Racist - A Human Racist

Anything Malaysia can do, Singapore can do better, says this smug Singaporean when it comes to talking about cross-straits relations. If Malaysians can get worked up over the term Allah and other Arabic terms by non-Muslims, we in Singapore can get worked up over race. Well, not actually. In Malaysia people get excited. Here in ultra-squeaky happy Singapore, the government tells us what to get excited by and the latest thing to get excited by is race or at least the race you call yourself on your National Identity Card (or NRIC as we call it). Now, you don't necessarily have to follow your father's race, you can actually chose what to call yourself. Someone even pointed out, you could be a double-barreled race.

I used to think that having race on your identity card was silly and lead to racial profiling. But then in the post-911 world, the Americans, the world's most liberal, easy-going folk on the planet decided it was acceptable to profile people as long as they were Semites...ooopps, I mean Arabs. So I guess I have to be trendy and accept that it's perfectly OK to be a total racist.

Let's face it, we're all racist to some degree or another but it is something highly impolite to admit to (Unless you're Israel and kicking the shit out of Arabs). When the South Africans lived under Apartheid we were most upset that anyone had the gall to admit to being racist. Being a racist is like farting, we loath to admit to being it.

I am a racist of the worst sort. If anyone has read this blog, they'd suspect that I had a problem with nearly every colour of the rainbow. I find Caucasians to have big mouths and no balls, Chinese to be inherent gamblers, Jews to be world class manipulators, Indians to be talkative rascals and Malays to be a little too fun loving and so on. My relationship with the love of my life started with her asking me, "Are you a racist?" Ironically, this racist here happens to have relatives of quite a few races. My two stepfathers are Caucasian and my Aunt is married to South African Jew. At the risk of going into sexual bragging, I've also had a sexual experience with a woman of every colour (White, black and yellow)

So how is it that me with all my racial hang-ups could bring myself to go to bed with a woman of different colours? I mean sex is a very personal issue as is ones views on race. I mean there are people who claim they would NEVER sleep with someone of a different race and throughout the years, sexual fetishes do get wrapped up in racial ideals - for example, Black men and Oriental women are supposed to have an image of fulfiling certain fantasies. I've heard of White girls proudly claim that, "Once you go black there's no going back." I've also had an American chap well me with some pride,"It's been a while since I fucked a round-eye."

Sex and race also get twinned up with dominance. A Finnish friend of mine discovered that Black people got very racist to him when he was dating a black girl. Some how black men became heroic when they dated hot blondes but got very upset to the point of being agressive when it came to seeing a blond guy with a black girl. Here in Asia there's something quite similar. My first shock of returning home came when I encountered a group of expats who got very upset with me for going back with a white woman (who was admitedly 12-years older to boot) - these being the same people who thought they were walking viagra ads for having a few Asian girls by their side.

Let's face it, race and sex do get entwinned and views on race and sex depend on your gender. But what can you do about it?

One is to develop understanding. I dated a black girl (girl would be the wrong term, she's 12-years older) once and during the course of the relationship found that skin colour was merely incidental. The relationship started because we liked each other and ended because we basically stopped liking each other. Race is noticable when you don't like someone but not when you do. Hence, I rant and rave about colours but seem to have friends of every colour.